Stuck in a Rut

So here I am, stuck in a rut :(

I have a whole bunch of ideas I would like to pursue, but can't settle on one or find the motivation to even start. Should I do an iPhone game? Should I start doing some XNA stuff again? Should I make a sequel to our moderately successful mahjong game, Mythic Mahjong? Should I make one of my many other game ideas, using my own game engine, The Atomic Engine?

Well, all these options have plusses and minuses, of course.

iPhone dev is painful for me. I don't get on well with the Mac environment and dev tools. I have a nice little 2D sprite engine, all ready to go, and a couple of reasonable game ideas. Do I want to commit the next few months developing on a Mac and for a platform that is absurdly difficult to make $$ on? I'm not so sure. The upside is that it's easy and like I said, I have my own engine ready to go.

Now, XNA. I like the XNA environment. I like working in Microsoft's dev tools, and I'm very familiar with DirectX/PC dev in general. I did some XNA stuff a year or so ago, and I actually quite like C#, and you can't fault the XNA framework for making things REALLY easy :) So, XNA sounds interesting, but what sort of exposure can you get for your hard work? There's the community games stuff, but that's full of crap, and noise, and good games seem to just get lost. You can publish on Windows, but XNA uses a thoroughly modern version of DirectX to run, and excludes a large casual audience. So, not ideal.

Making a sequel to Mythic Mahjong sounds appealing to me. I would be guaranteed to make some return on my investment of time and energy. The game would be fairly entertaining to write, and using my own engine would be a plus. The main problem here is the availability of my partner in crime, Damon. He's just started a new job and has no time for art or design.

So, what the hell am I going to do? I'm spinning my wheels here! Maybe a quick iPhone game while I wait for Damon. Maybe I brush off my XNA skills and knock a quick game out on that, and maybe collaborate with Rob over a Sorcery Games?

I could just make one of my other bright ideas using my home grown PC game engine. I like the environment and my engine is quite mature now, having written 2 complete games in it. I'll need art of course, but I could probably find someone wiling to do that for me. This sound like the most promising option to me right now.

This is too hard ..

A Bit Slow Around Here ..

Well, no update for a little while. No excuse other than I'm lazy I suppose. To be honest, not much has been going on. I've been sick and I haven't had any motivation to do any work after hours, so nothing really to report.

I'm trying hard to get some lingering web work out of the way, so I'm free and clear to start on a new PC game. That's just an excuse of course, if I had the energy and motivation, I'd be working on the PC game anyway, regardless. Oh well.

I need some excitement in my life!

Bounder

Years ago, I worked on a game called Bounder for the Commodore 64 home computer. It was actually the game that kicked off my illustrious career, and landed me my first full time, payed job in the games industry. That was a loong time ago, but I've often thought about how good that time of my life was. Carefree, hanging out and working with my mates. Making stuff up as we went along. It really is the essence of what I love about making games.

Anyway, the reason I mention this is that Bounder has been cropping up a lot in conversation recently. It's weird that a game I've barely thought about for 20+ years, is percolating in my monkey sphere again. It started a couple of weeks ago when I was having lunch with my old friend Rob.

First of all, let me tell you a little back story on Bounder and the 4 guys who made it. Bounder is a scrolling, bouncing puzzle game [link]. There were 2 programmers on the game; myself, and my good friend Andy Green. My lunch mate, Rob Toone was the designer, and a chap named Terry Lloyd was the artist. We were just a group of lads who knew each other and decided to write a game. The game changed all of our lives.

OK, so I'm having lunch with Rob, reminiscing about the old days and moaning about how soulless game development has become. Basically a modern day equivalent of two grumpy old men, talking about how everything used to be fields as far as you could see. He mentioned that he'd been chatting to Andy on the phone and they'd started talking about how cool it would be to make a Bounder remake on the iPhone or XNA or something. I agreed, and told him I'd thought the same thing, and that I'd been trying to track down who actually owned the IP rights to the game. We left it at that and the conversation moved on.

A couple of days later, I happen to mention Bounder to another old friend, who runs a game dev company in England, and surprise, he tells me he owns the rights to Bounder! It turns out he bought the whole Gremlin catalog a few years ago, and he'd just that week been thinking about a Bounder remake. Weird coincidence. I told him I'd been talking to Rob about doing something, and he was completely open to the idea of us making something if we wanted. Pretty damn cool really.

Then, a few days later, I get a message from an another old friend, who's an artist, who I haven't talked to in a few years, basically saying he wanted me to remake Bounder on the iPhone and he wanted to do the graphics. Now this guy is a totally bang up, amazing artist, and his style would be awesome for a remake.

Totally weird! I'm actually beginning to think that maybe all these little coincidences are telling me something. Maybe we should make a Bounder remake. It would certainly be fun to work with my old mates again.

I'll let you know if anything happens :)

Happy New Computer!

I've had my current computer system for 3 years, and it's beginning to get a bit dated, slow and generally flakey. So, it's upgrade time. Behold my new system ..

Case
Nzxt Panzerbox All Aluminum welded Gaming Tower Case w/Dual 190mm fans support - Black

Processor
Intel® Core™ i7 920 Processor (4x 2.66GHz/8MB L3 Cache)

Motherboard
Asus P6T SE -- Intel X58 Chipset CrossFire Supported w/7.1 Sound, Triple-Channel DDR3, Gb LAN, S-ATA Raid, USB 2.0, Triple PCI-E MB

Memory
6 GB [2 GB X3] DDR3-1333 Triple Memory Module - Corsair XMS3 Dominator w/DHX

Video Card
NVIDIA GeForce GTX 275 EVGA Superclocked – 896MB - Single Card

Case Lighting
Cold Cathode Neon Light - Blue

Power Supply
750 Watt -- Corsair CMPSU-750TX Power Supply - SLI Ready

Processor Cooling
iBUYPOWER Napoleon CPU Cooling Fan System Kit

Primary Hard Drive
500 GB HARD DRIVE -- 16M Cache, 7200 RPM, 3.0Gb/s - Single Drive

Optical Drive
22X Dual Format/Double Layer DVD±R/±RW + CD-R/RW Drive - [Lightscribe Technology] Black

Sweet mother of god, tis a fire breather!

A Good Point

A friend pointed out to me how schizophrenic my first and second posts seem to be. The first "Hello World" post seems all happy and positive about the day job I have, whereas the second is full of grumbling about being disatisfied and longing for pastures greener.

All I can say is, get used to it, I am in conflict.

Like I said in my second post, I have these "patches". It's been the same throughout my professional career. They usually preceed a change or movement or growth, as the restlesness becomes unbearable. Sometimes, it's just me letting off steam and venting a little.

I think we all have these conflicts, beit with work or relationships or whatever, that we try to resolve as best we can.

A Typical Day

Another day has drawn to a close, and I'm sitting here reflecting on what I did and didn't achieve today. I woke up this morning all bright eyed and bushy tailed, full of good intentions and a small todo list. Ok, that's actually a bit of a lie. I actually woke up bleary eyed and hardly able to form an intelligable sentence, pretty much like every morning. I did have a list of stuff to do though, and mostly (mostly), I got through it.

The first thing on my list was to get myself to work without getting killed in the maelstrom of lunatic drivers that is my daily commute. Mission accomplished! I actually carpooled today with my buddy Bob, so at least I had something/one to entertain me and distract me from the misery of the Los Angeles commute.

The next thing on my list was to simply get through my work day without tripping over something or walking into someone. This is a fairy common occurence at the office I work, as it is a dimly lit, warren of cubes and obstacles. Oh yeah, I also had some work to do, which I did. I had to add some logging into the scold/autoban system in one of our server flavors. Basicaly, if someone says "fuck" or "ass", or some other profane ad shocking word, they get warned and then banned if they continue to abuse the system. Just think of the Children! All very glamorous.

As an aside, I did have to file a police report today, which was marginally exciting. A Mac Mini got boosted out of my cube at work sometime last weekend, so I had to file several hundred reports with various departments. The police report was one of the final steps in a looong process. The female officer was very nice, if not a little stern and official. It was a little awkward standing in the main lobby, talking to a cop, while people walked in and out, staring at me like I was a child rapist or something. I tried flirting with her a little to lighten the mood, and got tasered and handcuffed (which isn't that bad, by the way). Actually, just kidding. I didn't, but I did manage to coax a smile or two from her.

Then I had lunch. Alone :( Because I am very popular here. Actually, the truth is, I'm too cheap to buy my lunch and go out with people, so I bring a packed lunch and eat it on the patio. I usually have lunch with my equally cheap friend, Bob (yes the very same carpool Bob), and the odd PUG, foolish enough to wander by and pull up a chair.

More work broke out in the afternoon, which was a little dissapointing.

My list finally got interesting (to me at least) when I got home. I'm a creature of habit, so I usually have a routine I follow. Sometimes I mix it up and do something random just to keep myself on my toes, but mostly I don't. So, I watched the news, then I exercised for 1 hour, doing treadmill and rowing. Then I practiced piano, because I'm trying to learn piano. Then I finally got to sit down and do some work.

I tend to do a lot of work at home. It's a problem I have.

Recently, I've been doing a lot of web dev stuff with a friend, but we decided it was a mugs game and we didn't want to do it anymore. So we're winding it all down and calling it quits. Unfortunately, I still have a couple of websites that just wont go away, and so I have to put in an hour or so on those every night. I hate the work. I'll be glad when it's all done and dusted.

At around 9:00pm, I eat dinner (or tea in England), which always strikes me as a litte late to eat. After spending some quality time with my Wife, discussing our scintellating days, and eating delicious Korea food, I go back to work.

Next up, and FINALLY, I get to play with my indie dev stuff. I had planned on finishing up stripping down the last game I wrote, to a bare framework, ready for the next game. I've done most of it, but there's still more to be done. The framework is built around something called "The Atomic Engine", which is a 2D game engine I wrote and continue to maintain. It has formed the foundation to both indie games I've created and had published, and it is a very useable and nice environment to work in. It's built on DirectX and has just about everything you need to make a 2D sprite based game. Even though it is supremely usable, I have a fairly extensive list of features I'd like to add, which I will, and most likely blog about it too.

Then around 10:30pm I down tools and play some WoW :) I have to get a quick Heroic or some PvP in before I go to bed, you see. It's an illness.

So there you have it, a typical day, and a run down of my daily todo list. Pretty damn cool, huh?

Mulling The Future.

I go through these rough patches a couple of times a year, where I get incredibly restless and frustrated with what I'm doing, and the direction of my life. I'm in such a patch right now. This one was triggered by news of some friends starting up an indie dev studio, and actually achieving a modicum of success, so far.

I get very thoughtful at times like this. I mull the possibilities and try and figure out ways to get out of what I see as the massive rut I'm in. I think about what it is I really, really want, if I could have and do anything I liked.

Apart from having the ability to turn myself invisible, this is what I want ..

I'd like to quit my day job and start a small indie dev studio, working with a small team of like minded, enthusiastic, energetic, and creative people. I'd like there to be a reason beyond "having to". I'd like to regain some of the enjoyment and purpose I used to feel, when sitting in front of a computer all day. I'd like to create something. I'd like to make and program games.

This is my dream, so how do I achieve it? How do I get from where I am to a position where I can indulge myself so unashamedly?

First of all, I need to be wealthy enough to not have to make an income. This is because it is tough to make a living doing indie games. It's a fact, and it's no surprise that most small devs don't survive, and that unless all the planets line up and you're buried under a pile of four leaf clovers, you wont make enough to support yourself, never mind a team. So I need money.

I also need people who share the passion and who can make the jump and support themselves financially while building our first game (or second, or third). That's key when there is no money available to support a team. I know some good people who have the enthusiasm, but most simply aren't in a position to do something full time and make the leap.

Finally, I need a plan. A plan of action, detailing what I want to achieve and how I'm going to do it. I also need a business plan to help expose the harsh realities of starting and runnig a small indie dev studio.

The money thing is covered, at least personally. I have enough put away to support myself for a couple of years if I have to. Other people are a little more tricky. I doubt I could find anyone willing to quit their day job and support themselves for awhile. Of course I could do it full time and just work with others part time. That could be quite viable.

The plan is easy. I have ideas-a-plenty, and the business plan is straight forward too. I already know the harsh realities that something like this would entail. I think realistically, the most appropriate way of achieving my dreams is to continue doing it in my free time. The problem with this of course, is that free time is at a premium, as is energy after a busy day doing my day job.

So what to do? Sit and dream I suppose. Oh, and continue to plot. I'll certainly continue making my games and hopefully, when all my ducks are lined up finally, I'll pull the trigger and just do it.

Hello World!

I wonder how many blogs start with a post titled "Hello World!". I'm nothing if not original I suppose. Of course, the title "Hello World!" is supremely suitable for someone in the computer programming field, so that's my excuse.

For my next trick, I will now introduce myself and tell you a little about me.

I am Chris Shrigley. I am 42 years old and I am a video game programmer. I have been programming since I was 13 years old, and I had my first game published at the tender age of 16. That was a really, really long time ago. Over the years, I have worked on close to 50 published games, worked for a handful of companies, both in England and the US, and even started a couple of games companies just for the hell of it. I am a grizzled, old, seasoned (like a good wok), veteran, that has seen and done just about everything there is to see and do in the video games business.

I am quite good at what I do.

I currently work for The Walt Disney Company, in their Interactive Media Group, working on low level server technology and architecture for the MMOGs we do here. My days are filled with sockets and protocols and figuring out how to optimize 100,000s of simultaneous connections. Oh, and putting out fires and fixing stuff that goes wrong. I also do a fair bit of pure R&D, and get to play with all sorts of cool stuff.

Okay, so that's a little about me and what I do to pay the bills. There is much more of course, and I'm fairly sure I'll tell you more in good time. Meanwhile, the big question is; What is this blog about? Well, it's about me, my experiences as a games developer, both by day and by night as an indie developer, and my views and opinions on just about everything else that crosses my addled old mind.

So stay tuned. Yay!